There ought to be a word for “only seeing one other person”, the way that we have “single” to mean “only seeing zero other people”. Dual? “I’m dual” doesn’t quite sound right. “Monogamous but not on purpose” doesn’t really roll off the tongue. In any event, I’ve had times where I could really use that sort of word, especially when I first started seeing Carrie. Some lingo would be helpful here, if I could alias to it “I am seeing one or more people but am in fact available to see other people and, in particular, you”.
Maybe if more of the world started using OkCupid’s terminology, and “available” became understood to mean “available but not single”, that would suffice. I mean, my asking for a word that means “only seeing one person” begs asking why there wouldn’t be more such words. “I’m triple”. “I’m triangular”. “I’m closed-v”. “I’m a hypercube”.
Plus, I’m starting to realize that, outside of monogamy, “seeing someone” isn’t really a binary. One can (and generally is) in a sort of suspended state of seeing people, where there may be some time between encounters but there’s still a sort of ongoing togetherness in the ether. And from what I’ve seen, there’s rarely a cutoff, just a sort of fizzling where it gradually becomes understood that that particular bond is of a different sort now. I don’t know.
This is by way of saying that I am, for all intents and purposes, newly dual.